October 14, 2008

Jesus: 0, Evil Priesthood: 6

Six people tried to attend services at the chapel of Palm Beach Atlantic University on Sunday. But because they were members of a group promoting equality for homosexual men and women, the pastor called in the police to arrest them for trespassing.Duccio di Buoninsegna: Jesus Captured (detail)

Not very Christian of him, if you ask me. Or maybe I missed the part in the Bible where Jesus, enraged that some outsider dared to try to sit in on a sermon, called in the Roman Centurions to haul them away in irons.

Jesus preached love, acceptance, and forgiveness. He taught that it's up to you be offended, so if someone does something that offends you, simply refuse to take offense.
But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also. - Matthew 5:39, King James Bible
But Terry "Pontius Pilate" Wheeler, Director of Campus Security, had a different message for these six wayward souls:
"You are an unwanted guest. We have asked the Police Department to enforce the trespassing law."
Or as PBAU spokeswoman Becky "Caiphus" Peeling explained:
"We were hoping they would heed our warnings and remain off campus."
The fact is that the actions of Palm Beach Atlantic University do not square with the teachings of their proclaimed Savior. But they match the actions of the Jewish priesthood who conspired against him almost perfectly.

So Palm Beach Atlantic University, a college dedicated to teaching the finer points of the ministry of Jesus Christ (who they believe is the Son of God), reacts to a crisis of Faith by completely turning their backs on those teachings.

Jesus held that we teach best by example; lead the kind of life you want others to emulate. Well, PBAU has a lesson for us, and it's not the one they claim they're teaching. But it is the one they are actually teaching.

Sorry, Jesus. I guess you got nailed to that tree for nothing.


  1. Christian hypocrisy? But that's unheard of!!

  2. I comment only to make the distinction between Christian and Fundamentalist Christian.

    The Fundamentalist Christian takes the Bible literally, word for word and that the Bible is infallible in every way. The Fundamentalist Christian is making the stink about gays and evolution.

    The Fundamentalist Christian also accounts for less than 10% of Christians in the United States and even less everywhere else in the world.

    Catholicism, the largest denomination of Christianity in the world, does not share the views of the Fundamentalist Christian. Although the Catholic church still does not approve of homosexuality or gay marriage (neither does Obama or Biden, by the way), the Catholic Church is the only major denomination that does not exclude members based on sexual orientation. It considers homosexuality to be a sin, but in the context of homosexuality being sexual relations outside the boundary of marriage. And since we are all sinners, gays and lesbians are no worse than divorced people.

    The Catholic Church also accepts evolution as scientific fact and has done so for over SIXTY years, going back to Pope Pius during WWII. The Catholic Church has a saying that the Bible was "inspired, not dictated" and takes the author into account.

    I mention this because: 1. I'm Catholic and hate getting lumped in with these morons. 2. I spent three weeks in September studying this stuff and thought I'd share. 3. Well...I really hate being lumped in with these dickheads!

    One other thing that Christians believe, but apparently these morons don't read the Bible enough to know:

    Those who distort God's word and push others away from Him will be judged the most harshly.

    Have fun in hell, fuckers!

  3. I personally believe that there are people living by the teachings of Jesus Christ, and then there are those who merely pay lip service to those teachings. The problem is that no matter how you try to distinguish the difference, you will always wind up with the latter claiming that they are the former.

    So I try to keep very specific when I write on this subject, and try to avoid using terms like "Christianity" because it's too broad a brush. There are undoubtedly legitimate Christians out there, as well as the pretenders who think attendance is a Christian virtue.

    In this case, I am not condemning Christianity, or even Christians in general; I am specifically addressing the hypocrisy of the administration of Palm Beach Atlantic University, which is what we used to call a "bible college" back when people were more honest about such things.