August 29, 2008

Closing the Minority Gap; A Desperate Ploy

Me, I think it's desperation. Can't you hear the midnight session in a back room of GOP headquarters, 'The Man Who' and some GOP toady, trying to work it out?

TMW:
"SHIT! Their candidate is BLACK! How can we compete with that?"

Toady:
"No doubt about it, sir. This gives them great leverage with the masses."

TMW:
"My ticket needs its OWN minority; there's a minority GAP!"

Toady:
"Yessir. It's a shame we pissed all over Colin Powell, but who could have guessed? We could pull..."

TMW:
"NO! We're not raiding the Supreme Court to build up our ticket. Besides, people hate the Supremes almost as much as that punk kid. We need something else."

Toady:
"I was going to say, we could recruit someone from Miami; they have a surplus of Hispanics that are conservatives."

TMW:
"Screw that. They'll be after us to invade Cuba, for chrisake! Like we need another invasion! And we're trying to distance ourselves from the civil-rights abuse of The Punk's administration. We don't want a book-banner on our ticket!"

Toady:
"Well, let's see...there's still a lot of fallout over there that Hillary didn't get the nod...if we chose a woman, we'd not only close the minority gap, but we'd have a valid choice for all those disenfranchised Liberal gals."

TMW
"Are you crazy? Don't call them 'gals.' Shit, people think I'm old school. What's wrong with you. Still, you have a point; a woman could work. Best of all, we'd close the minority gap without having to have any, well, you know...minorities."

Toady:
"OK, a woman it is... any preferences?"

TMW:
"Just as long as she can keep her mouth shut. Don't bring me someone with a lotta damned opinions like Chrissy Whitman."

Toady:
"Well, that leaves Ann Coulter out..."

TMW:
"And a great ass! Something to make having her around worth it!"

3 comments:

  1. I've been rubbing my hands together and quivering with glee ever since they announced her candidacy yesterday. This is going to be good!(not necessarily for the country, but it'll be damned entertaining) ;-)

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  2. Sure will.

    "What do you offer as your party's candidate for VP?"

    Biden:
    I've served on the Foreign Relations Committee, and the Committee on the Judiciary which includes subcommittees on fighting terrorism, immagration, and homeland security."

    Palin:
    "I can land a Coho Salmon by myself, and shoot hoops in high-heels."

    ReplyDelete